reclaiming community

gardening.
eating food that comes from your own soil. using soil that comes from your old food and plants and dirt. getting dirty and being with people, who come from dirt and will return to dirt. really, there's nothing like eating a salad comprised of all sorts of tantalizing, delicious, exciting and enigmatic flavors that you yourself planted, helped to grow and harvested just at the right moment at the peak of the season...we can sustain ourselves. its simple, empowering, creative, and completely fulfilling.

cruising.
the feeling of riding your bike everywhere around town; whether or not its work, a concert, the gym, the local farmers market or just for a pleasant afternoon adventure. its cheap, its sentimental, its youthful and smart and completely necessary. why take a car when you can take a backpack and boost your calf muscles? why trap yourself in traffic, limit yourself to highways and speed limits wen you can feel the wind literally pull the saliva from your lips and whip across your face with such invigorating, awakening sensations?

community.
its about sharing meals together, slowly, with a glass or two of wine, talking about our trials, our joys, our best jokes and most estranged stories. its about seeing the people who check you out in the grocery store and asking them their story, knowing where they go home to after work, caring about their time and existence. its about meeting together with people of similar interests and passions to collaborate on ideas and movements to better the city, the neighborhood, the state and bring us all together as people who love one another and care for one another as delicately, beautifully, powerfully created beings. its about taking time to ask your neighbor to join you for dinner or to make sure that you are keeping in touch with the people who are hurting, who are poor or hungry, those who may be doing well and sharing in their abundances.

join the movement that somehow got displaced by our innovative technologies and our distancing ourselves from that which is so fundamental to our health and existence. reclaim your community in the whole sense of the word. seek wholeness and health and simplicity while thriving in this amazing and evolving society. live off the land. eat food. thrive in community with fellow humans and other creatures. work hard. play harder. take root:)

hello july

i woke up this morning and all of the cloudy grey skies that have dominated the month of june conveniently dissipated, allowing me to enjoy a brisk, beautiful, sunshiny day to welcome the new month...

july holds a lot for me...its a month of remembrance and celebration of the life of my sweet marvene...its a time for picking fruit and living abundantly in the heat of summer...its the cusp of new horizons, jobs, churches, people, ideas

the loquats are sprouting, much more than i could have even expected. they're little baby saplings, roots growing fervently across the dark, rich soil...

i fall asleep tonight with a full belly of good, nourishing food, good nourishing thoughts, a lot of questions and what ifs and where to's, a lot of gratitude, and finally a song that somehow seeped into my head this morning with this new day that has brought me back to singing, humming, baking, writing...being well

:)

the money tree

money has been on mind. not that i want a lot of it, am utterly starving for it, or obsess day and night over it. but the fact is that do to the things that i want to do in life (aka keep learning, have good family dinners, take trips with friends, plant gardens all around san diego, establish a cafe, give freely to my friends, pay off my debts to my school and my delicious family members)

i applied for a credit card today. i know,with this economy, bad timing right? but its time i start getting money back for the wonderful credit i have maintained over the last four years and its time to step outside of my box and take ownership for some things! 0% APR for 12 months, a free limousine ride all around the town, free junk mail for life, auto rental insurance, AND a cute little flashlight for my keychain!??

sign me up!!!

here we go into the world of capitalist consumerism... or maybe its just student loan debt settling in....

patience. sprouting .seeking

there's a few things on my mind these days... i think they're pretty well summed up by these two separate, but very related verses.
2 timothy 1:7 says "for God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline". this has been ringing in my ears as i've been meditating in scripture and trying to push myself in my relationships, my job hunt, my passions, etc. i'm not one to be shy or fearful, but so often i experience small surges of these emotions in the midst of life in transition...questions, unknowns, changes, exciting developments... i have all the strength and confidence i need because i know and trust that He has made me the way i am, has given me my gifts and desires for me to be bold and to live abundantly... However, with these changes in my role, my friendships, my career directions and new seasons, i also must take to heart that fruit takes time to grow from certain planted seeds, that patience is among the most needed medicines, that those dreams and hard work which will be long lasting and bountiful can hardly materialize overnight...
2 peter 3.9 says "the lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance". as i pray for the Lord to increase in me His patience, to provide for me and guide me, i'm also remembering that He is faithful to keep these promises. there are a myriad of delicate, intricate examples of this all around me that encourage me to continue to seek Him, to challenge myself in my faith, in my questions, in my relationships, in my community...

june

june gloom is rampant throughout san diego. not gloomy in a depressing kind of way, but gloomy in the 'it looks grey outside when i wake up makes me want to sleep in and play all day' way. make sense?

but these grey skies and balmy breezes are just an over-sized incubator for all green, growing, silently sprouting things...


farmers markets.
loquat seedlings.
new fruits. new friends.
music.
green roofing.

peach season

the succulent and juicy devouring of fruit has begun.

there's an amazing secret market (that is not really that secret though i like to think of it that way) that sells the most delicious fruits and vegetables of all sorts (the kind that you wouldn't just stumble upon in the back of a vons supermarket). the price is unmatchable, the taste unbelievable.

apricots. pluots. mangos. donut peaches. nectarines. starfruit. pears. cherries. apples. sweet baby bananas. papaya. dragonfruit. korean melons. grapefruit. asian plums.

i can hardly contain myself.
i wake up and bite into the most juicy and sweet peaches that have ever touched my lips. i graze on apples and plums and apricots like a chain smoker inhales Marlboros.
good thing that my digestive tracts are working smoothly :)

cheers to all the summer fruits and the blessings of their sweet aromas and tastes dancing fancifully across our tongues...

ash blue dragonflies and days spent in the river...

drifting in cool refreshing water, diverged in some sacred place between arizona and colorado, watching the dragonflies rest their wings upon my sandy toes, feeling the glare of Sun's gold reflection splashing heat and radiance against my sweat-stained skin, the wind rustling among the reeds that longingly hang beside the shoreline... floating downstream among swirling green rapids, the air, hot and dry as my skin could bear, a flawless blue sky for my gaze to lose itself in...

cleansing is so necessary. reading and resting and eating fruits and vegetables and going to bed when its dark and rising when its light, listening to the animals, heeding the rhythms of the earth. recalibration is so necessary. the desert is astonishing. ambrosial. delightful. vibrant. sacred. silent and not so silent. paradisaical. engrossing. alluring.

as evening approaches and the heat finally recedes as the shadows grow on the trees, the moonless night sky begins her dazzling pageant of shooting stars, glimmering dusts and roaming satellites. darkness falls and i find myself lying beneath the vast dome of limitless sky, universe, life...wondering

how big is it? how many other places just like earth are there if there are trillions of stars and planets and suns and galaxies just like ours? how vast and unfathomable is god if in fact there are more stars in the universe than grains of sand on earth? have you ever examined the insurmountable quantity of individual grains of sand after only lightly pressing your skin against it??

i laid there on the desert floor feeling the warm energy of the rocks and dirt pushing against me, gazing out into this infinity of light and darkness, of god and mystery and wonder, my mind losing its ability to focus on one idea or thought or emotion and i tried to sift through endless questions of meaning, of truth, of love, of trust, of the unmistakable evidence in this overwhelmingly magnificent earth of our intimate relationship with the creator.

big questions like what if there's more than one way to know god, to follow him, to love him and to experience his fullness. silly questions like how long will it take for us to be able to explore those farthest outcroppings and bring back samples of space dust for all to see and taste? all of these questions are pushing me deeper and deeper into my love for god, further and further into my own, unique faith in god. i am constantly amazed and speechless that god has created this vastly beautiful universe in all its grandeur and majesty, and he created the materials and energy that organize themselves as delicately as dragonfly wings, as a human mind, and other delicate and complex things...

for some reason that moment, that hour spent dazed beneath such an immense sky, was so significant for me. the thought that came about again and again, just as constant and reocurring as the swirling eddy's of the river, was,

"i want to be known...i want the god of the all this immeasurable existence to know me..."and i know this is how it is, but there are small, sacred moments when all of existence and the unlimited possibilities of it unleashes its weight right in the very middle point of my soul. so i let the warm tears slide silently down my cheek as i enjoy and experience these emotions and explore them all the more...